Ten years ago, casual dating would’ve seemed ridiculous to some people. Now you’ll see so many individuals going for casual relationships than serious ones. Through casual dating, a person can have fun without having to deal with the expectations and commitments found in steady relationships. Then again, any casual relationship can also turn sour and even result in disaster. It starts when one person becomes too attached to his or her casual dating partner. So before anything goes wrong, people who’re loving casual dating should know why they shouldn’t get too attached to their casual dating partners. Here are some reasons why.
You’re giving the person a right to hurt you
Before you even decided to have a casual dating partner, you already knew that there won’t be any commitments and expectations. As you start to see the person more and more, you develop an attachment. When you’re already too attached to the individual, you’re giving the person a right to hurt you. Not that he or she is aware of that right. Your partner doesn’t even have to know. When your partner sees other people and you become aware of it, you’ll end up being jealous. You’ll be torn between keeping your feelings and sharing it with your casual dating partner. If you decide to let it out, your partner may not even listen to you.
You’re ruining the relationship
Once you’re too attached to the person and you get jealous when he or she meets other people, you’ll start to ruin the relationship. Sex won’t be as good as it was. You’ll start to question your partner’s moves. You might even call your lover more often. Although it seems like the right thing to do, your partner may feel that you’re already crossing boundaries. It is casual dating after all so there shouldn’t be any expectations. Eventually one of you will give up. It’s either you’ll break up with your partner because of too much pain or your partner will leave you because he or she no longer thinks you’re sticking to the rules of casual dating.
You aren’t being casual
Being attached to your partner and acting like you’re in a serious relationship means that you’re not being casual after all. You have to control yourself if you don’t want to end up being hurt. You were once excited about the idea of having a casual dating partner and you were so sure it would stay casual. As much as you’d like it to stay that way, you can no longer control your emotions and you want it to be more than casual. If this happens, then casual dating may not be for you after all. If you really, really like the person, you may confront your partner and express your feelings. Just make sure that it’s real. Remember that your hormones can make you crave for intimacy after sex. Never blame it on your hormones. If it’s just because of the bond you feel after sex, give yourself some time. It may not be real after all. Shrug it off and soon you’ll master the art of casual dating.
How casual dating should be
Casual dating has to be casual – spontaneous, unexpected, unplanned. No commitments, no rules. It’s all about the fun and excitement. When emotional attachment, jealousy, and pain enter the picture, it’s no longer casual.
For all casual daters out there, remember that this kind of setup isn’t for everyone. Don’t get too excited with the thought of dating and having sex with someone you just met. Understand your needs and find out if casual dating is for you. Know the rules and see if you have what it takes to follow them. And if there’s one rule you should never forget, then it’s never falling in love with your partner. That’s bound to happen if you become emotionally attached to him or her.
As they say, the best things in life are free. Nothing can compare to the feeling of loving someone and being loved in return. Then again, this doesn’t mean that you have to rush yourself in finding the right person. It takes time. Be patient and love will come to you. Just don’t expect to find it from casual relationships. Also, before you get into any casual relationship, make sure that you’re prepared for the consequences of being too attached to your partner. Even a casual relationship can hurt you. Don’t give your partner the chance to hurt you and leave you crying. If what you want is true love, find it somewhere else. Better yet, wait for it to knock on your door.